The Coach Has Left the Village, The Gymnasts Have Been Fed

"We should write a parody called 'Bela Karolyi's Dead,'" said the text message from B. Monsoon.

We should. After all, no Olympics is complete without Bela Karolyi kvetching about "cheating," poor judging and convoluted scores.

Poor Bela.

This is why I watch the Olympics, not for the feel-good features, commentators who talk just to hear themselves, or even the sport itself.  No, I watch to see Bela Karolyi get irate.  He's been a part of my TV life since 1984, when the games were in my hometown, but I still had to watch Mary Lou Retton get the perfect 10 on the small screen.  Bela was there lashing out at someone.  And he was there, although played by someone else, in the made-for-TV movie Nadia.

White chalk lines the uneven bars.  

Undead, undead, undead.

That made my night.

* Just in case you never heard the original, you can listen to "Bela Lugosi's Dead" by Bauhaus over here.  Also, I was thinking about changing it to "Bela Karolyi Said," since he's still alive and all.  I don't know, I'm not very good at the Weird Al thing.  If you have some lines, add them to the comment section.