Let's Recap

AOL's Headlines for Morons boasts "Quake Scares Californians: People Flee Los Angeles Buildings, 'That Was One of the Worst Ones.'" So now, when you start getting phone calls and emails from your frantic friends and family outside of the state, you know why.

It started at about a quarter to noon. I was at ye olde day job when the building started swaying. I figured I would work through it, felt like nothing more than tiny tremble, but the swaying grew rockier, started to feel more like airplane turbulence, so I finally got up and walked over to the doorway. Then my co-workers started calling their families, only to realize that their cellphones weren't working. I tried mine. Nope, couldn't call cellphones or landlines from my phone. Couldn't text message other cellphones but, for some weird reason, could text messages to Twitter.

Then I did what every other good desk monkey does in times like these. I logged on to MySpace. At least ten of my friends had just posted about the earthquake. Okay, so we have confirmation that it happened. I tried to check Caltech's site, but couldn't load the page. Then my friend Robbin posted the magnitude and that it was somewhere around Pomona. Ivan posted a roll of zingers like:

"Al-Qaeda showed off their earthquake machine today"

I posted that my cellphone was down and a slew of friends messaged to say that theirs weren't working either. Apparently, everyone was okay, but at a loss on how to live life without a cellphone.

I called home from a landline to see how my parents were doing and to check on my record collection (I really need to mount those cases to the wall). Everything was fine, but my mom was concerned because my brother was in Ontario, right next to the epicenter, taking the California Bar Exam.

I saw that a friend of mine in Ontario was online, so I figured it couldn't be catastrophic. Emailed him to ask how he was doing, asked about how Ontario was holding up, etc. He was fine and told me to tell my mom that my bro should be okay too.

My brother called my mom during his break and was laughing about the whole thing. He told her that he kept writing, on account of this shaker being nothing compared to the Northridge earthquake that ravaged our neighborhood and scarred us for life years ago, but then he noticed that there was a light fixture swinging above his head. He ducked.

You know who's native whenever an earthquake happens. We start to crack jokes and take stabs at the magnitude of quake. As long as it's under six, it's not that bad, we'll tell you. Stuff may fall, there might be a few scrapes and cuts, but at least the roofs aren't caving in this time.

And we're all awake in ways that we normally aren't on weekdays. We are no longer sighing through your typical on-the-street conversation.

"How are you?"

"Okay, and you?"

"Fine. What are you up to?"

"Nothing much, just working. How 'bout you?"

"Same, just working."

Now, we actually had something to discuss.

"Damn, did you feel that? What were you doing? Everything okay now? It wasn't that bad, it was more of a roller than a jolt."

At around 1:30, the string of MySpace posts had ceased. Our cellphones were now functioning properly. At work, the we began answering calls that had nothing to do with the earthquake, went back to scheduling appointments and sending out letters. Everything was back to normal.

It was just another earthquake